One time for the big girls....

This is not a blog that is intended to offend anyone, but it probably will.  I don't have anything against larger people and I don't think being small is the way to go.  In fact, being Texan.. I'm usually with the "bigger is better" mentality.

However, with all this said, I think people should be more considerate of others as well as spatial constraints in crowded areas.  So this blog is for fat (this does not apply to the thick girls, shine on) girls in the club:

Fat girls have more sweat than skinny girls. It's fact because they simply have more surface area. And they aren't afraid to attack you with it.

They generally roam in packs of 3 or more and move like stampedes.  Fast, fat and hungry.

Big burly manly bitches.  The dress doesn't fool anyone. You are a man.

Fat girls shouldn't try to move like skinny girls (in the club).  Physically impossible. Can't fuckin do it. So when you're laughing with your girls and you're wildin out, please be mindful of your limbs. That shit hurts when you hit me.

I recommend not wearing pleather, shiny spandex or full on animal prints.  I just don't think it's in your best interest.

You can't do the "Middle School Dance, girls circle with your shoes in the center" thing at the club. Consider this, compare the size of a circle made of Cheerios to one made of Glazed Donuts... Now, marinate on that.

Big girls need love too.  I get it.  But skinny girls need space as well.  As such, can you re-arrange yourself accordingly?  That's all I ask.  We can all dance and have a good time if you'd just be a little more mindful.  If I'm tipsy and "Get Silly", "Let Me See Yo Booty", "Pop, Lock and Drop It" or "Ride" come on... I can get caught up in the rapture and forget my "club bubble" I should be dancing in.  Fortunately, my friends help me keep that in check.  Big girls, bring your friends to the club that will act as that person for you.  And "no", not the ones that let you leave the house with all that Spandex.  She is not your friend.  I know a lot of guys... and I can't think of one that appreciates that.  Common misconception... lots of booty mass does not equal quality booty.

These are just the observations/requests of a skinny bitch.