Get A Ring On It?

My friend sent me a link for the following book: http://bookoutlines.pbworks.com/Why+Men+Marry+Some+Women+And+Not+Others

Now, I've never been engaged, almost married or married...I'm just a girl who is a serial monogamist and believes in a silly little thing called love.  One of my best friends (Brandon) would let you know that I don't read, as such... I have no idea the details behind all these bullet points!  However, there was a particular part of this outline that caught my attention, the (chapter?) titled "The Six Basic Guidelines For Women To Get Married".  I'm going explore these suggestions and of course... give you my 2 cents.

Insist on it

Bad idea.  Have you met/spoken to/dated any men in the last decade?  If so, you'd know the following - in general, men have a fear of commitment.  Something about not wanted to be tied down to one twat for their entire life.  If you can find one that is okay with only hitting and quitting you... you've got the whole ugly stigma that marriages carries to overcome.  You will never let him watch football or play a video game again, you withhold sex, make him hang out with your mom, you generally ruin his life.  If you want to "self insist", be my guest.  However, I'm sure that will ooze through your pores and he will sense it.  If you are adamant about insisting, especially a) before he's ready b) specifically during the first few dates c) before you're in a exclusive, committed relationship d) before you've exchanged "I love you's" e) before he's missed an event he would not otherwise miss (for God or Country) to be with you...I'd suggest you be prepared to cry in a corner like a little bitch.  Don't insist, just be you.  If it's for him, it's for him.  You don't want to end up with someone forever because you "insisted".

If you find yourself in a dead-end relationship, move on
This one isn't bad.  Just move on for the right reasons.  If you're happy (progressing, growing) but you don't hear wedding bells.. don't split.  Everyone's internal clocks tick differently.  Look at the big picture... is your haste worth 86-ing your (current) relationship status?  Don't get me wrong, I figure most people in my age bracket (25 - 30) should be past their childish ways and should be able to make this assessment in a few years.  Don't wait on someone for 8 years.  If they can deal with your ass for that long, they could have married you!

Love yourself first
This is a good one.  Do it.

Commit yourself to the idea of getting married
I believe that if you need to mentally prepare for marriage, you probably shouldn't be so pressed to have it.  Marriage is a natural progression.  If you eat, sleep, breathe marriage and it doesn't magically appear... you're going to end up being miserable.  So try this... make a list of things you don't like about yourself (not cosmetic).. and do just that.  Work on 'em.  You can even make a list of what you want in a man (not cosmetic OR superficial)... and when you meet someone... see if they possess those characteristics.  Commit to yourself, then a man, then marriage (when you're both ready).

Keep in shape, watch your weight, and take care of your appearance

I want to tell you to be you, appearance doesn't matter... but this is America.  And truth be told, even the most hobo of men won't approach you if you look like Amy Whinehouse.  Your milkshake still has to bring the boys to the yard.  Don't go on some crazy diet (probably not healthy) or purchase the Booty Pop (false advertising)... if you feel good about you.. it will show and people will be attracted to it.  Me, I'm a girly girl... but I'm also lazy.  I don't always do my hair, wash my face.. hell... sometimes I don't even shower everyday (just being honest).  I feel like I should be upfront about this with any man I date.  Because I'd prefer to hang out one-on-one at someone's house.. you are going to see a me you didn't see at a club, picnic, day party, happy hour, etc.  My hair will probably be all over the place and I'm likely going to be wearing a shirt with a hole in it.  That's me.  Take me or leave me.  This is hit or miss.  I guess I've been lucky? 

Time is running out—use time wisely in your search for the marrying man

What does this even mean?  Is there some sort of final mark-down clearance special on marriage?  I thought I'd be married, barefoot and preggars with my first kid by now.  In actuality, I'm single, drinking tons of Barefoot Moscato and fearing getting fat (via pregnancy) but welcome the huge boobs it will bring.  I do feel old sometimes, but rushing... blueprinting...scheduling a marriage P(lan) O(f) A(ction) probably won't get me there any faster. 

There is no magic trick, formula, outline.  Give it time.  You should only do this once.