1) When I was little, my dream was to be Miss America. I had a portfolio and a few gigs, but quit modeling because my older cousin did. To this day, I somehow still think it’s my mom’s fault that I’m not Miss America.
2) I’m a shopaholic. Once, to prove that I wasn’t… I went on a hiatus. I didn’t buy anything (other than food) for 3 whole weeks. It was a terrible, terrible experience and it hurts thinking about it.
3) When I was in 8th grade, I missed cheerleading try-outs because I was the assistant director for the drama clubs one act play “The Bad Seed”. I was really sad about it, but they ended up holding a second round of tryouts later that year.
4) Contrary to popular belief, I’m not an only child. I’ve been told I give off that “only child vibe”… whatever that means. I have an older half brother (Duwane) and a little sister (Falon) who’s 18. Recently, my dad told me his son (that he didn’t know he had) found him… I don’t claim him. I was over 21 after I found out about him… I’m good on siblings. Maybe that’s what ppl mean about the “only child vibe”…
5) When I was younger, my mom thought I was going to be an Engineer because I couldn’t stay away from Legos. Truth is, I hate math & science and like being around people too much to be an engineer.
6) I might have been a spoiled kid. My favorite Christmas present was my Barbie convertible. I insisted that my dad mow the yard in “lanes” so I would have “streets & highways” to drive on.
7) My mom calls me a sugar baby. I love anything sweet. Chocolate, cake, icecream, cookies, powered donuts…
8) Mom also calls me a junk food baby. There was a time in my life where I ate fast food at least twice a day, everyday. The absolute worst thing about the DMV is the lack of Jack in the Box, Whataburger, Taco Cabana, Sonic and easily accessible Chick-Fil-A’s.
9) When I was a kid, I always wanted to know how big I was in comparison to the “M” in Macys on the top of their building at the mall.
10) I’m pretty random. You may find me randomly highlighted on ppl’s facebook quote sections for saying things like "Why be a regular hoe? Video hoes get paid!"
11) I don’t like spoilers on cars. I have this theory about monkey’s being able to hang from them.
12) So far, my greatest accomplishment was buying a home when I was 22. My grandma was all about being an independent woman and she would have been thrilled.
13) I’m an all or nothing type of person. Stay on my good side… because the bad side gets ugly.
14) I’m honest. I’ve lost friends because they’ve asked for the truth… and I gave it to them… but they didn’t like what I had to say. I might apologize for hurting your feelings, but I don’t apologize for feeling the way I do.
15) I like to go out, mostly because I like to dance. I dance in the morning getting ready for work, when I’m cleaning the house or really when there is music being played. Also, I usually exhibit an uncanny amount of crunkness while dancing.
16) I consider myself to be a great friend. Disclaimer: I’m really terrible at calling people, or finishing emails that I’ve started to you… but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you or think about you. Text me, and I’ll respond right away. If you need advice, a budget, a cuddle buddy or some retail therapy… I’m your girl.
17) I’m hungry, now… always.
18) I have a LOT of energy. Even more when I’m tired. Tell me to sit down somewhere and I’ll get it together.
19) I like to be right. I actually have this theory that I’m usually always right. Don’t bother disagreeing with me… well… because… I’m right.
20) I can prove to be an embarrassment to you if we’re in public. Sometimes I can’t control how loudly I say things. Fortunately for you, I don’t say them and hide. I’m not afraid of confrontation.
21) I love birthdays, mine especially.
22) My favorite foods are Mexican, Italian and Soul food. Probably because they are the most saturated in fats… just the way I like it.
23) I can’t sing, but I love doing it anyway.
24) I’m a picture whore. I like to have the latest and greatest camera available. On the flip side… I’m pretty bad at posting pics on FB.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
M.O.B
I'm a girly girl. I would never consider myself to be one of the guys, I don't drink beer, I can't sit through and entire game (on TV). The exception is football. Love football, plus the nice butts and physical aggressiveness involved doesn't hurt. Generally, I'm more comfortable in a circle of guys, talking about sex and whether the girl who just walked by has an ass which outweighs the confusing situation going on with her face.
I can also be an emotional, confusing girl... Just like we all are. However, I'd like to think that I'm logical, (on avg) 90% of the time. I have found that the majority of women are...not. I don't think some of them even know what it means to be logical (men involved or not).
Conclusively, I've found that bitches just aren't my thing. I have maintained very few close friendships with girls and you know what? The failures? Well, I'm gonna go ahead and blame them, for two reasons. I always think I'm right and this is my blog...I do what I feel! Here are a couple of things women do that drive me to befriend testicles over tits:
1) If you're pretty and you know it, clap your hands. *clap, clap* I cannot stand women who look to their girlfriends to constantly compliment them. That's what your man, faux boo, sideline groupies, parents and grandparents are for. If my friend looks hot, of course I'm gonna give her an "Ooooohhhh! You look hot/pretty/etc". But the "I feel so ugly today, do I look ugly?!" comment she makes to get me to say "Of course not, you're beautiful always!"...is only gonna piss me off. In fact, it's caused me to give undesired responses like "maybe you should wear more make-up" or "maybe you should call in sick, because you look it".
2) If a man is trying to date you it's clear. He's around all time time. He calls/texts/chats with you regularly during the week. He pays for things when he says he's going to take you somewhere. I don't want to talk to you about the seemingly obvious. "Why haven't I heard from in a week?!" I couldn't tell you, because unless he's the last man on earth without a cell phone, a Google account or out of the country... He's probably not that into you. No matter HOW busy a man is, he will always make time if he's interested. This stands for anyone in your life. I don't want to dissect every text/convo you ever had to figure out where the hell he went. Ask him, because I don't know.
3) I don't understand spending $500 on one purse. I've never understood it, I never will. Supposedly it's a status thing. The way I look at it is - "this broke hoe saved up for this one pricey ass purse. She just has this one. It's the only one you'll ever see because she really can't afford to have multiple". I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks this way. I'd rather blow $500 in H&M.
4) I don't like talking about my feelings. Feelings make you weak, vulnerable and susceptible to emotions you probably don't have a good handle on. Girls like to talk about their feelings ALL THE TIME. Some of the biggest fights I've had with the people I'm closest to were because I held all my feelings inside and then just emotionally leaked and they had no clue what the hell happened. Now, I understand that approach is flawed... I'm working on it. However, one of the reason's my main bitch is the main bitch is because we don't have to talk about our feelings all the damn time. Example:
Dana: I want some Jack Daniels and I need to grind on strangers.
Jerica: Noted. Whatcha wearing?!
Dana: Jerica, why are you always plaguing me with details?!
Jerica: Because, clothes are important.
See? We had an entire convo without having to talk about it all. Jack Daniels? She probably had an exceptionally obnoxious day at work and wants to kill everyone there more so than usual. Grinding on strangers means that either A) We haven't done it in a while or B) Her main squeeze is working her nerves and grinding on a perfect stranger and then leaving him standing there when she's done, numberless, nameless and uncomfortably satisfied would suit her well that evening.
5) A lot of women have this "I don't need a man but I want him to fill up my tank" mentality that irks the shit out of me. The idea of being a trophy wife or having some random dude funding my trips makes my skin crawl. I'm not offended if I'm dating a guy and he falls back on going out so much because money is funny. In fact, I appreciate your financial responsibility. That doesn't make you cheap, or sorry, it just means all this Maggiano's is adding up! I can't sit here and listen to you bash this man because he doesn't want to buy you last minute tickets to see Drake. Stop being a gold diggin' hoe!
I can also be an emotional, confusing girl... Just like we all are. However, I'd like to think that I'm logical, (on avg) 90% of the time. I have found that the majority of women are...not. I don't think some of them even know what it means to be logical (men involved or not).
Conclusively, I've found that bitches just aren't my thing. I have maintained very few close friendships with girls and you know what? The failures? Well, I'm gonna go ahead and blame them, for two reasons. I always think I'm right and this is my blog...I do what I feel! Here are a couple of things women do that drive me to befriend testicles over tits:
1) If you're pretty and you know it, clap your hands. *clap, clap* I cannot stand women who look to their girlfriends to constantly compliment them. That's what your man, faux boo, sideline groupies, parents and grandparents are for. If my friend looks hot, of course I'm gonna give her an "Ooooohhhh! You look hot/pretty/etc". But the "I feel so ugly today, do I look ugly?!" comment she makes to get me to say "Of course not, you're beautiful always!"...is only gonna piss me off. In fact, it's caused me to give undesired responses like "maybe you should wear more make-up" or "maybe you should call in sick, because you look it".
2) If a man is trying to date you it's clear. He's around all time time. He calls/texts/chats with you regularly during the week. He pays for things when he says he's going to take you somewhere. I don't want to talk to you about the seemingly obvious. "Why haven't I heard from in a week?!" I couldn't tell you, because unless he's the last man on earth without a cell phone, a Google account or out of the country... He's probably not that into you. No matter HOW busy a man is, he will always make time if he's interested. This stands for anyone in your life. I don't want to dissect every text/convo you ever had to figure out where the hell he went. Ask him, because I don't know.
3) I don't understand spending $500 on one purse. I've never understood it, I never will. Supposedly it's a status thing. The way I look at it is - "this broke hoe saved up for this one pricey ass purse. She just has this one. It's the only one you'll ever see because she really can't afford to have multiple". I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks this way. I'd rather blow $500 in H&M.
4) I don't like talking about my feelings. Feelings make you weak, vulnerable and susceptible to emotions you probably don't have a good handle on. Girls like to talk about their feelings ALL THE TIME. Some of the biggest fights I've had with the people I'm closest to were because I held all my feelings inside and then just emotionally leaked and they had no clue what the hell happened. Now, I understand that approach is flawed... I'm working on it. However, one of the reason's my main bitch is the main bitch is because we don't have to talk about our feelings all the damn time. Example:
Dana: I want some Jack Daniels and I need to grind on strangers.
Jerica: Noted. Whatcha wearing?!
Dana: Jerica, why are you always plaguing me with details?!
Jerica: Because, clothes are important.
See? We had an entire convo without having to talk about it all. Jack Daniels? She probably had an exceptionally obnoxious day at work and wants to kill everyone there more so than usual. Grinding on strangers means that either A) We haven't done it in a while or B) Her main squeeze is working her nerves and grinding on a perfect stranger and then leaving him standing there when she's done, numberless, nameless and uncomfortably satisfied would suit her well that evening.
5) A lot of women have this "I don't need a man but I want him to fill up my tank" mentality that irks the shit out of me. The idea of being a trophy wife or having some random dude funding my trips makes my skin crawl. I'm not offended if I'm dating a guy and he falls back on going out so much because money is funny. In fact, I appreciate your financial responsibility. That doesn't make you cheap, or sorry, it just means all this Maggiano's is adding up! I can't sit here and listen to you bash this man because he doesn't want to buy you last minute tickets to see Drake. Stop being a gold diggin' hoe!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Truth
A few weekends ago, I found myself in an informal setting when I got hit with a 1-2-punch. "I date white women because black women don't like black, educated men". Pause. Ummmmm, what?!
I've never participated in this conversation as often as I do living in the Washington, DC area. In fact, at my school, I would argue we had the opposite problem. Black men that wouldn't get a second look in DC were swooned over, simply because our selection was so small. There is one guy that comes to mind who is a certified booger wolf, but apparently, always had females. Aside from the fact that he was a booger wolf, he was also whack, so I never understood it... but hey.. do you.
Having a blog, here is my opportunity to put my take on the whole situation in the record books.
"Black, educated women think we [black men] owe them something"
The majority of my close friends are black, educated women who love a black, educated men. The problem we face is that a lot of these men feel we owe THEM something because they aren't in jail, selling things illegally or being a sorry baby's daddy. Since they did [gasp] what they are supposed to do, we should all marvel in their wonder. Negative. I did what I was supposed to do as well. I didn't turn prostitute, have a bunch of kids or develop a drug problem. However, that means I think I'm "too good". I have been fortunate to only date guys that aren't threatened by the fact that I don't need them to survive. If a strong, black woman threatens you... perhaps you are better off expanding your horizons.
"We only have two options, hood rats or educated girls"
I'm certain this statement is wildly inaccurate. You simply can't place black women in to those two small categories. I understand what he was implying. Some educated men have an issue of not being "hood" enough for women they approach. If a few girls feel you don't possess an adequate level of gangster... don't keep up on the whole bunch. I don't see the necessity in running around shooting people... some people are turned on by that... however, I'm certain you can find a girl who will accept the fact that your most gangster moments are while cutting someone off in traffic or listing to a Young Jeezy CD.
"Blah blah blah"
He wanted to continue the conversation... but me and my friend were trying to drink and have fun... not get all serious! Here are my final thoughts... men, women, drop your sense of entitlement. If you made your life choices to impress other people... you should probably reconsider your entire... life. Hopefully, you've filled your resume with things you wanted to do. At the end of the day, it's about how the person in question treats you. Don't swear off a whole type of people because girls you've encountered (who happen to be black and educated) didn't follow this theory. No, you didn't owe her anything. Find another, keep it moving... but stop using something you are equally guilty of as an excuse. Please and thank you.
I've never participated in this conversation as often as I do living in the Washington, DC area. In fact, at my school, I would argue we had the opposite problem. Black men that wouldn't get a second look in DC were swooned over, simply because our selection was so small. There is one guy that comes to mind who is a certified booger wolf, but apparently, always had females. Aside from the fact that he was a booger wolf, he was also whack, so I never understood it... but hey.. do you.
Having a blog, here is my opportunity to put my take on the whole situation in the record books.
"Black, educated women think we [black men] owe them something"
The majority of my close friends are black, educated women who love a black, educated men. The problem we face is that a lot of these men feel we owe THEM something because they aren't in jail, selling things illegally or being a sorry baby's daddy. Since they did [gasp] what they are supposed to do, we should all marvel in their wonder. Negative. I did what I was supposed to do as well. I didn't turn prostitute, have a bunch of kids or develop a drug problem. However, that means I think I'm "too good". I have been fortunate to only date guys that aren't threatened by the fact that I don't need them to survive. If a strong, black woman threatens you... perhaps you are better off expanding your horizons.
"We only have two options, hood rats or educated girls"
I'm certain this statement is wildly inaccurate. You simply can't place black women in to those two small categories. I understand what he was implying. Some educated men have an issue of not being "hood" enough for women they approach. If a few girls feel you don't possess an adequate level of gangster... don't keep up on the whole bunch. I don't see the necessity in running around shooting people... some people are turned on by that... however, I'm certain you can find a girl who will accept the fact that your most gangster moments are while cutting someone off in traffic or listing to a Young Jeezy CD.
"Blah blah blah"
He wanted to continue the conversation... but me and my friend were trying to drink and have fun... not get all serious! Here are my final thoughts... men, women, drop your sense of entitlement. If you made your life choices to impress other people... you should probably reconsider your entire... life. Hopefully, you've filled your resume with things you wanted to do. At the end of the day, it's about how the person in question treats you. Don't swear off a whole type of people because girls you've encountered (who happen to be black and educated) didn't follow this theory. No, you didn't owe her anything. Find another, keep it moving... but stop using something you are equally guilty of as an excuse. Please and thank you.
To Date or Not To Date
I've been judged for being a serial monogamist. "Date", "have fun", "you're young, you don't need to be in serious relationships"... I've been told. Truth is, I like [love] being someone's somebody. I guess being single and having fun seems appealing to a lot of people, but I'd much rather have my love by my side every night. Maybe I believe in fairy tales...
Conclusively, that's some ole bulllllllshit!
I'm starting to have a better understanding of the other end of the spectrum. Men are stupid. All of them. For one reason or another. They do stupid things. (Women are also stupid). However, when you're not in a relationship...it doesn't make sense to deal with one person's stupid antics. Too many other people will hang out with you and get you ice cream. Either way, the formal dating process still doesn't appeal to me and here's why:
It forces people to be socially awkward - I don't want to go out with who you think I think you are. I don't want you to hit me with your professional and private resume of great qualities. At the end of the day, we all know you suck in one way or another... just like I do. Let's just stop by Redbox, order a meat lover's pizza (with no pepperoni) and get to know each other.
It sets unrealistic expectations - This tight little black dress that shows off my teeny waist and my little curves and 4-inch heels are not what I wear everyday. I don't normally wear make-up and usually sit "indian style" everywhere I go (outfit permitting). You need to know in advance that I say ridiculous/offensive things all the time. That's who I am. Similarly, men are usually exceptionally well-groomed for dates. You smell nice. In real life... you smell less nice. I need to know ahead of time if I can deal with your man funk. If I can't deal with your man funk, I can't deal with you.
It sets unrealistic expectations - Buying me dinner does not mean we're having sex. Or that you can feel me up. Pretty self explanatory.
Bottom line is this - You want to "date" me? You have to engage me, request my presence and allow me to feel comfortable around you. After we've done that, we can do the official dating thing. Dates are way more fun if you're already comfortable with the person. One day all this will end in someone reeling me in and wife'n me up. For everyone who missed the boat, I'll just be the one that got away.
Conclusively, that's some ole bulllllllshit!
I'm starting to have a better understanding of the other end of the spectrum.
It forces people to be socially awkward - I don't want to go out with who you think I think you are. I don't want you to hit me with your professional and private resume of great qualities. At the end of the day, we all know you suck in one way or another... just like I do. Let's just stop by Redbox, order a meat lover's pizza (with no pepperoni) and get to know each other.
It sets unrealistic expectations - This tight little black dress that shows off my teeny waist and my little curves and 4-inch heels are not what I wear everyday. I don't normally wear make-up and usually sit "indian style" everywhere I go (outfit permitting). You need to know in advance that I say ridiculous/offensive things all the time. That's who I am. Similarly, men are usually exceptionally well-groomed for dates. You smell nice. In real life... you smell less nice. I need to know ahead of time if I can deal with your man funk. If I can't deal with your man funk, I can't deal with you.
It sets unrealistic expectations - Buying me dinner does not mean we're having sex. Or that you can feel me up. Pretty self explanatory.
Bottom line is this - You want to "date" me? You have to engage me, request my presence and allow me to feel comfortable around you. After we've done that, we can do the official dating thing. Dates are way more fun if you're already comfortable with the person. One day all this will end in someone reeling me in and wife'n me up. For everyone who missed the boat, I'll just be the one that got away.
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